♢ Shy Dragon ♢

@shydragon402@wje

Dark humour is like cancer. It’s funnier if children get it https://youtube.com/shorts/ii-el7xUbE0?si=NNyCHge65KHaNFOA ⭐️

Registriert am 7.1.2024 · 11 Follower · Zuletzt aktiv vor 2 Jahren

Phone

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

what the hell do i have saved on my phone and why

A surreal image featuring various Pokémon with human faces riding on each other against a cloudy sky background.

Tea

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

A cartoon drawing of a smiling boba tea cup saying "suck my balls."

Dog

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

I can’t take my dog to the park anymore.

Why?

The ducks keep trying to eat him.

Why would they do that?

Because he’s pure-bread.

Horse

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

Yes

The image shows four different types of horsemen. The first one is a man with a horse's head, grilling on a barbecue. The second is a centaur. The third one is a horse with human legs, and the fourth one is a horse with the bottom of a human body. The image has text at the top that reads: “The four horsemen of horsemen”.

Ear

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

The image shows a series of illustrations depicting various ear arrangements on a human and cat-like figures. The first row includes a human with cat ears, a human with only cat ears, and a human with hidden human ears labeled "Schrödinger's ears". The second row shows a human with cat ears on the side, a human with human ears on the top and a cat labeled with question marks. The third row depicts a cat with different ear arrangements, labeled with question marks, "???++", and "Hellspawn". The last row includes a human with two sets of cat ears, a pink blob with many ears with the text "I'm all ear" and a collection of eyes with ears with the text "do not be afraid".

Surprise

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

A drawing shows a method to cheer up a friend. In the first panel, a woman brushes her teeth and wonders 'why am I alive'. The second panel shows the same woman squeezing out of a toothpaste tube onto a toothbrush. A text next to her says 'hahaha surprise'

Life

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

This definitely works

The image is a drawing with four separate life tips on how to make your friends like you more. First, a person is smiling and has a feather tucked in their collar bone, it says 'do a smile to make yourself look like you are not completely dead inside' and 'hold a feather to let your friend know you are not harmful anymore and it is all in the past.' Second, the same person is wearing a lace glove, it says 'wear a single lace glove to show that you have a delicate touch.' Third, it says 'why not wear an outfit that really shows off your figure'. Fourth, a blonde person is holding a leash attached to a dog. It says 'borrow a dog or a child of your choice so people will want to talk to you more'.

Mango

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

The image is a four-panel grid. The top left panel shows a woman standing with the text "Woman stand." The top right panel shows a woman walking with the text "Woman go." The bottom left panel shows a man standing with the text "Man stand." The bottom right panel shows a mango.

Toddler

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

Two cartoon dogs are lying in bed. The dog on the left looks tired. The dog on the right is in a restless pose. Text above them reads "Sleeping with your toddler is like sharing your bed with a drunk octopus looking for its car keys." The source @blueydudes is printed at the bottom of the image.

Pen

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

A tattoo on an arm shows a pen and a sword crossed. A banner under them reads: "THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD".

Tea

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

☕️

A Google search bar shows the query "Should I kill someone, or have a cup of tea?" The "Did you mean" suggestion is "Should I kill someone, and have a cup of tea?" Below this is the text "Ah, yes, my mistake. Thank you." and an image of a person sipping tea next to a British flag.

Football

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

This is SLIGHTLY wrong

The image shows a google search result for 'Who is most popular football player?' The highlighted answer is 'Cristiano Ronaldo'. However, the image next to the text is of Lionel Messi. The text below says: "He is known for his incredible speed and scoring ability. Cristiano Ronaldo is a popular face in the world of professional football. He is a Portuguese professional footballer who is considered one of the greatest players of all time. 14. mars 2024"

Greeting

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

Heroin Monkey

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · Insider · vor 2 Jahren

I need to check Heroin Monkey more often

A screenshot of a social media app displaying a user list with a large number of unread messages (58) next to the user named "Heroin Monkey". Other users are visible with fewer or no unread messages.

Opossum

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

OPOSSUM

Pumpkin

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

The image shows two side-by-side photos of a carved pumpkin. The left image shows the unlit pumpkin with a goofy, cartoony face carved into it. The right image shows the same pumpkin with a light inside, making the face glow.

Finger

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

The image shows a text conversation. The first message reads, "I just typed 'finger' with my finger xd". The second message is, "WHAT?". Also, a grey sticker with the text "child slave" is placed above the first text message.

Chocolate

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

Cherish you chocolate milk.

A cartoon character named Charlie is shown above a glass of chocolate milk. Text on the image states, "Charlie has bought you some chocolate milk. She shall return Wednesday."

Yo mama

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it told her "I wanted your weight not your phone number."

Shipping

♢ Shy Dragon ♢ · auf WJE · vor 2 Jahren

Others, tearfully: Stop shipping real people!!

Me, packing an old lady in a FedEx box: Nope!