Haven-Witze

Der Engländer fragt eine deutsche Person: -"How do you like our big lake?"

Deutsche Person: "Oh! Schön!"

Engländer: "What the fuck? I thought that just a lake is!"

Deine Mutter steckt sich eine Batterie in den Arsch und singt: "I have the Power!"

I have the campfire, Ben, and you're not even full life.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the middle one for you. 😂

Kurz vor den Wahlen wird ein Chinese gefragt: "You have elections?"

Antwortet der Chinese: "Oh yes, evely molning!"

Sagt der Midlaner zum Jungler: "Gib mir Blue, du Hurensohn!"

Sagt der Jungler: "Pardon, je ne parle pas allemond."

Darauf der Toplaner im All-Chat: "OMG GG GAME OVER WE HAVE FRENCH JUNGLE!"

By 2023 A.D. there will have been 2 walls built by the new silk road.

At bandcamp what did Russel Simmons say in a Russian accent? "The world is doomed. It's the 7th Trump-Pence (Trumpets)!"

Was steht auf einem Grabstein eines Anime-Süchtigen? "Hentai Haven für immer!"

Fragt Fritzchen seine Oma: Was ist das?

Sagt die Oma: Der Hafen und du hast ein Böötchen!

Fragt Fritzchen: Darf ich mit meinem Böötchen in deinen Hafen fahren?

Sagt Oma: Nein, das darf nur Opa mit seinem dicken Brummer.

Why doesn't Ed Sheeran have a girlfriend?

because sheer-an! Badummm TTTzzzzzz

Doctor: "Donald Trump, you have demetia..."

Trump: "You mean dementia... the country in africa?"

Why do all Java developers have glasses?

Because they cannot C#.

Bill Gates passes the prototype of a "mind-reading-toilet" to Donald Trump so he can rule America without circumstances. Trump examines the latest thing and pisses. The "mind-read-loo" automatically twitters: "I piss on China!". Trump is excited and farts: The "mind-read-loo" sends automatically e-mails to build a great wall and sends Mexico instantly the bills. He shits and a computer-generated voice says: "Mr. President, you entered the password "THE_GREATEST_BULLSHIT_EVER!" to N.O.R.A.D. The nuclear intercontinental ballistic missiles start in 3...2...1...launch.... Thank you for using the "mind-read-loo" and have a nice day.