Teppich

  • Wie heißt der rote Teppich, der an der Air Force One ausgelegt wird, wenn der Präsident gelandet ist?

    Ist doch klar: Trumpelpfad.

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  • George Floyd

  • George Floyd Lieblingssmusik: Pain in the Neck von Ace Frehley, die Musik von George Lynch, Breathe von den Backstreet Boys, alles von Pink Floyd, Another One Bites the Dust von Queen und The Golden Casket von King Baby James.

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  • Essen

  • Ein englischer Witz: Witch fish is faster? A Hot fish or a cold one? A Hot fish because YOU can catch a cold! 🤣

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  • Wortspiel

  • What is the difference between an African and an Indian elephant? Just one is an elephant!

    Once there was a terrible king. He was also just 30 cm tall. So he was a bad king, but a great ruler.

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  • Mann

  • In the 1960s, a man living in the Soviet Union walks into a bar and asks, "How much for a beer?"

    The bartender replies, "Beer used to be 50 kopecks, but we had to add another 50 kopecks to pay for the Communist Party’s five-year economic plan. So it’s one ruble now. Everybody must pay for the plan."

    The man thinks for a moment and says, "Alright, I’ll have one beer, please."

    He puts down a ruble on the counter. The bartender takes the ruble and gives back 50 kopecks.

    The man says with a confused smile, "I thought you said everybody pays for the economic plan."

    The bartender replies, "Yes, comrade — but the problem is, we have no beer."

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  • Schiff

  • Wenn deine Mutter der Strohhut-Bande beitritt, geht das Schiff unter (der Untergang der Flying Lamb)!

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  • Trump

  • Ein reudiger Hund zieht am 19.01.2021 den Schwanz ein und fliegt mit der AIR FORCE ONE nach Florida?

    Niemals.

    Trump wird bei der Vereidigung Bidens natürlich dabei sein, um diese zu verhindern.

    Überraschung folgt!

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  • Job

  • Bewehrbung- Ich wolte mal anfragen ob sie tswischendurch auch leute zur Aus-Hilfe mal einen Shop geben one Renteversicherung und lohnsteuer. Wen ja,würde ich gerne wissn was dan der Lohn wer. Ich bin ein deutscher un im Juni geboren und Telefon habe ich nicht. Bin auf baide Hände tädowiehert und könnte nur nachmitags ein bischen arbeiten, weil ich moorgens den Wecker nicht hörre. Hochachtungvoll V. Lenzer

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  • Melodie

  • A: I have a catchy tune about this one Beatles song.

    B: Which one?

    A: I want to hold your hand.

    B: Ok. *takes it*

    A: [...]

    B: Which song did you mean?

    A: [...] Uh... Don‘t let me down.

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  • Alabama

  • One, two, three. Turn it up. Big wheels keep on turnin'. Carry me home to see my kin. Singin' songs about the south-land. I miss Alabama once again and I think it's a sin, yes.

    Well, I heard Mister Young sing about her. Well, I heard ol' Neil put her down. Well, I hope Neil Young will remember, A southern man don't need him around anyhow. Sweet home Alabama Where the skies are so blue. Sweet home Alabama Lord, I'm comin' home to you.

    In Birmingham, they love the governor (boo-hoo-hoo). Now we all did what we could do. Now Watergate does not bother me. Does your conscience bother you? Tell the truth. Sweet home Alabama Where the skies are so blue. Sweet home Alabama (oh yeah) Lord, I'm comin' home to you. Here I come, Alabama. Oh, oh, oh Alabama, oh, oh, oh Alabama, oh, oh, oh Alabama, oh, oh, oh Alabama

    Now Muscle Shoals has got the Swampers And they've been known to pick a song or two (yes they do). Lord, they get me off so much. They pick me up when I'm feelin' blue. Now how about you? Sweet home Alabama Where the skies are so blue. Sweet home Alabama Lord, I'm comin' home to you. Sweet home Alabama (oh, sweet home) Where the skies are so blue And the governor's true Sweet home Alabama (Lordy) Lord, I'm comin' home to you, yeah, yeah Montgomery's got the answer.

    Best Lied ever:)👍🏽🥸

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